Someone to Care and Understand

A friend is a gold coin, a best friend is a gold bar and a BFF is a treasure! To have a shoulder to lean on when you're alone, to be held in someone's arms when you're feeling down and nobody knows, is worth something. To have someone to talk-out your heart is enough to face whatever life puts in your way. Earn, earn a BFF, a treasure, before it's too late. It'll help you to find your roots.

I found out my treasure when I was 16, I was studying in +1. My stream was Commerce and we had a little strength of 13 students. 12 girls and a single guy! His name was Nethan Bijoy. He had a twin-sister, Nancy Angela, who was in the same class too. No one, even I, expected him to continue in our class. We all were so sure that he'd dump Commerce and move on to the Science batch. But he didn't. And I don't know how did I get to be so lucky!

 

We didn't talk much during the first few weeks. To be frank, he wouldn't even look at the other girls but Nancy! Let me tell you, at that times I didn't even recognize that he existed in our class! He was not that quiet, but, not that blabby either. Yeah, he'd talk, but only if you make the move and put the stick on his mouth and, believe me, the chap never stops once he gets into it! But I didn't know all these, then, I was like "Ah.. What the hell's up with that guy?"

Then one day, our class teacher decided to change the seating arrangements of the class and since I was the VI gal, I got to sit in the first row. And since Nethan was the only guy in the class, he, too, got to sit in the front row, on the right front row, directly in front of the blackboard, right beside me! Ha! funny how life gives you what you exactly need at the moment when you least expect it. I wanted to talk but I kept my face blank and my mouth shut-tight for an hour or so. Gosh! I didn't wanna let him think that I'm the girl with a mic on her throat, which I am, really!

Then the next hour came, which was Accountancy and it is hell to me. No need to mention I had to read the stuff on board which I never could and do the stupid calculation all by using my 'not-so-cool-at-math' brain. Usually I write down board-written stuffs with the help of my neighbors dictating 'em to me. "Crap", I thought, "how the hell am I gonna ask this boy do that for me? What will he think?" I closed my eyes and screamed inside. I said 'inside' right? But, wow, the chap beside me heard that, I think! "Hey, want me to read it out?" He asked with a crooked smile. Stunned, I opened my eyes. "Erm..." I paused, feeling like a total jerk. "Well, yup, but... How do you know?" "Oh, like you're an alien!" He frowned. "Who doesn't know in here, wait, you're my classmate, right?" "Fine, please read it out for me, would you?" I asked with a smile which I managed hard not to fake. "Of course" he replied and started reading out for me. "Man! He's cool, really" I thought to myself and smiled as we went on with the class. I managed to say a weak "Thank you" after the class which he waved off with his hand. He smiled at me and I returned it. "So, Maria, friends". He put up his right hand which I took in mine and, "friends", I said. We shook hands. Yo! There ya go, ha!

Days, weeks and months passed by and our friendship grew bigger and stronger with each passing day. When we got free hours, we'd talk and talk about many things; life, dreams, friends, food, movies, music, yes! MUSIC. He was a really good singer with an outstanding voice. He was a great fan of Akon, Eminem and Enrique. He wanted to be a rapper, and I wanted to be a Popstar. Wow! Our dreams were cool, eh? There were many times when we'd sit together, he and I, and we sang. Not really,I sang and he rapped. We had a cool time doing that. I simply loved it! I think that's what brought us together, so close. But, I hate teling you guys this, he HATED Miley Cyrus! Whom I ADORED! He used to tease me, callin' me "Piley Virus", git! That's one of many things we quarreled about!

Nethan was a typical, decent gentleman. But he did have the usual boyish  restlessness which would get you crazy sometimes. What touched me most about him was his care for others and his innocence. He was so understanding. I can tell you this from my heart. No one ever understood me, never, as he did. He knew even the minute things about me which I never noticed by myself. And that, that is really rare among my friends. He had every faith in me even the times when I had no faith in myself. He would go on cracking jokes and saying stupid things to make me smile whenever I felt down or depressed. He was a big brother, a caring friend, a part of myself I never wanted to lose.

All these times, when I look back, I can honestly say that I've never had a friend like Nethan. He is special. I can't tell you how many times we'd had a fight, (mainly 'cause of my fault) and it was HIM who called me up and said 'sorry' to make it alright. I've never ever found a person so caring, so forgiving and so loving; unless  you count my Mom, but that's different. He's my diamond in the rough. He is my treasure!

The Gift of a Mother

The greatest blessing of my life is my Mother. I think it'd be the same for every human being, wouldn't it? A Mother who loves, cares and stays for you! Oh... What a wonderful blessing it is! We all owe God for giving us such a precious person in our lives.

My Mom is my role model after Jesus Christ. I try and want to be like her in my life. She is such a great personality and she live her life in a way that makes me so proud to be her daughter. She taught me the little things that make you perfect. She taught me to be myself. She taught me to forgive and forget the things that hold you back from moving on. She taught me that love and forgiveness are not a business affair of 'give-and-take' but it's just the one-way of 'giving-giving-giving-and-giving'...

My Mom is my Heroine! She was a cute kid for her relatives, a darling daughter to her parents, a caring sister for her siblings, a true friend for her friends, a loving wife for her husband, a living God for me. She taught me to be humble, to close my eyes towards others' flaws but to open them towards my own and to open theirs towards themselves. She taught me to believe in God and myself. She taught me to let go of the memories that keep on hurting and making me someone else I'm not.

When I was a little girl, about 5-6 years old, and I used to sleep with my Mom, there were nights when we didn't sleep but just kept on talking about this-and-that things which were both big and small. I remember well, sometimes she used to hold me close and talk about life. She enjoyed talking Philosophy with me. She used to tell me about her life, her childhood, the way the world behaved at her and how she faced them. But let me tell you, I had neither listened nor understood whatever she was talking to me. I just lay there, thinking about something else and responding to her speeches with the usual "mm..."s, "aah..."s, "oh..."s and "uh-huh..."s. I think she knew that too. But she didn't care. She must've known that I'll understand them when I grow up. And she was right. It is now that I have a room for myself and when I lay awake at night waiting for sleep to embrace me, I think of those little Philosophical speeches and understand their meaning and what she was trying to tell me through them.

I remember once I asked her how did she get to be so wise and she answered me with a smile: "Pain, my dear daughter, pain can be a great teacher althrough your life. It helps you learn that everything you wish for may not be as beautiful as it ought to be." And I think that's what help me to live with courage. My Dad once told me that I made Mom cry when I was 10 days old. That was when the doctors had discovered that I had no sight in both my eyes and decided to operate me right then. I think the long list of faliures in my life started right from that moment!

But I know I've made her smile too, with my music. She loved music and died to sing and to listen songs when she was young and even now. She had told me about some of her girlfriends who could sing very well and whom she'd make sing only for her. She told me once that my talent for music was a special blessing she won from God through her non-stop prayers. Believe me, I started singing when I was 6 months old! Yes!

My Mother is a miracle. I really can't believe how lucky I am to have her. She is not perfect. Of course she is not  beautiful on her face. She has so many flaws in her. But for me, she is perfect, she is the most beautiful woman in the world. I just want to be a woman like her althrough my life. And in my next life, if there is one, I would prefer to be her daughter again!

My Songs: 5. You and Me

You and Me

I bless the day I found you
'Cause that's when I got something new
You are the one I wanted to meet
The one I've longed to see

You're always there for me
Helping me to get what I need
You give me love and forgiveness
And now I have happiness

Do you know what my heart says?

/Chorus/
I will never forget the moments
We had together
You have taught me the word 'friendship'
That lasts forever
Which has its roots in our hearts
That never lets go apart
But always be
You and me

You make me laugh and cry
You are so tough tell me why
You fill my life with colours of love
Colours that I haven't known

Do you see what I try to show?

/Chorus/

I was never as good as you
But you told me that wasn't true
You have hurt me deep in my heart
But you healed me with your art

And I can say...

/Chorus/

My Songs: 4. When I Look Back

When I Look Back

I miss you so much
It's been like ages
I feel so sad, it's been much hard

I'd felt so happy
When I met you that day
Smiling at me, that was worth it

And I so wanna be near you...

/Chorus/
When I look back at the ways
I've been through all those days
All I can see is you
All I can feel is love
And now somehow
We're apart but in our hearts
We'll be together, oh yeah....

When you made me cry
I always wondered why
You hated me, what could it be?

But now I realize
How much you sacrifice
To help me to become, the one I dream of

You're my sight and truth...

/Chorus/

No matter where I go where life takes me
I just want you to know I'll always be
Your little girl, your naughty child

I'm so sorry for the times I've hurt you
I promise I'll never ever leave you
I love you, I hold you close to my mind

/Chorus/

My Songs: 3. He is the One

He is the One

There was a day in my life
When I thought I was so blind
That's when He came along and
He made me think

There was a part inside me
That was just sucked-up inside
And now I know what happened
That's what I sing

He came and knocked at my door
And when I opened for Him
He lifted me off the floor
I do believe

/Chorus/
He is the One
He is my strength
He makes me wanna live
I do believe
He is the One
He is my breath
He is my Eternal Sun
He is the One

When my plans go on too bad
Oh, I feel down and so sad
I heard him saying to me
"It's alright, dear"

When my friends move on too fast
Leaving me standing at last
No, I will never worry
I have Him near

'Cause He came and knocked at my door
And when I opened for Him
He lifted me off the floor
I do believe

/Chorus/

Jesus, my Saviour
I'm yours forever
Take me along And let's be together

/Chorus/

My Songs: 2. Divine Light

Divine Light

Everybody needs someone
To push them on, to hold their hand
Everybody wants to live
To believe in, to have a stand
Everybody has the call
To have it all, to live their dream
Everybody has those times when their heart is on their sleeve

Here is the true way to go
C'mon let's get movin' on...

/Chorus/
Oh... Divine Light
Enlighten us, kindle our minds, strengthen us
Help us to go ahead, stay with us 'till the end
And when we fall down, oh, hear we call on to you
Divine Light

Sometimes it gets too late
When you make your fate, when you try to walk
Sometimes it seems too lost
When your faith is gone, when you fail to talk
Sometimes you feel so lonely, like your heart is torn apart

Here's the One who's always on your side
C'mon let's start all over again...

/Chorus/

It's hard to climb up, yeah
'Cause life's full of challenges
You gotta keep up your chin
And face all the strangeness
God will work like the yeast leavening the flour
And you will rise again like a morning flower

/Chorus/

My Songs: 1. Who I Am

Who I Am

Life goes on and on
We don't know where it stops
Thoughts change all the time
We don't care what's right

Someone makes us laugh
Someone makes us cry
Someone just makes us what we are (2)

/Chorus/
What's wrong, which's right
Where to start our way?
Don't hesitate, don't regret
To live your everyday
When you lose yourself out
Just close your eyes and say
I'm what I am
And I know who I am...

Dreams may come and go
We don't know which to choose
Friends are here  'n there
We lack the Mind's Glare

We love who loves us
We hate who hates us
We don't realize who is who (2)

/Chorus/

Sometimes you may lose yourself
You may feel weak and pale
Bust just know no one ever walks
Without a single pain
Never think that you're alone
No, no everyone's not gone
Understand there's really someone
Who's been waiting for you
To be you
To be with you
To make you what you are...

/Chorus/

Pop Star!!!

The biggest dream of my life is to become a Popstar like Hannah Montana (Miley Cyrus).... Obviously I can't stop dreaming of it 'cause I love music and it's in my blood!!!

I'm an Indian and there's always a belief that Pop-Music doesn't have that scope over India. My Dad took me for learning Indian Classical Music. But I didn't like it that much. Obviously I jumped out of there within 7 years!!! But I didn't know anything about Pop-Music at that time. It was something weird, blah-blah thing for me.

When I was in XI, one of my friends, Joana Ann James, told me about Miley and I started listening to her. Needless to say, I fell on my face for her as the first time I heard her music!

I write my own songs and compose them by myself. I'm blessed with very supportive parents and a lot of super-cool friends who call me a up-coming Popstar and even say they're my fans! Of course I'm really lucky to get many opportunities and I'm planning one solo album this year. I'm in the works of it.

My dream is my only hope....